Take Up Space For Your Art
I’m an artist but when someone asks me what I do, I usually reply “I work in software development”. Both are true but sometimes I fear of being judged by others if I tell them I’m an artist.
Making art is not looked at as a real job by many and sure, I could spice it up by saying “I’m a creative entrepreneur” or “I own a Music Licensing Business” to flex but I still see myself as a non successful artist. I focus too much on my failures to notice the successes. I sometimes forget that being an artist is not just a job but a vocation for me. It’s something I’ll do until I die regardless of superficial views of success. So why don’t I take up space for my art?
Fear
This fear of taking up space and declaring that I am an artist stems from feeling like I’m not bringing any value to the world in modern society. It also stems from my insecurity of comparing myself to my peers who went the traditional route of getting jobs in Corporate America.
In my youth, I remember cautiously telling people that I wanted be an artist who would make music and tour the world performing. I remember my elders telling me, “I know you like music but you should have a plan B”. They’d say, most artists starve and it’s really hard to become successful. It’s better to get a job and work towards stability.
Thinking back, I know my elders were just trying to look out for me but I knew at the time that my heart was in making art and it still is 25 years later. Yet, I still have a fear of being asked more questions if I tell people that I’m an artist because I’m not where I thought I would be at my age. I’m now in my late 30s but over the past couple years, I’ve learned to have gratitude of my journey. I took stock in listing all my accomplishments as well as my failures but at the end of the day, I’m alive, I have my health and I can still play an instrument and love playing it.
I’m an Artist
Over the recent months, whether talking to a stranger in a ride share or coffee shop, the question always comes up of “What do you do?”. My first gut reaction is out of fear to say “I work in tech” or “I am in software development.” But then I pause, own the silence to let that fear pass, and take the space to say “I’m an artist”. If people are still interested, then I lead them to my art because I believe in it and want to share it. What is life without art anyway?
Creating Space
If you struggle with letting your art take up space, you are not alone. I think it’s something I’ll always struggle with depending on what situation I’m in but it’s ok to take space and share your art. It’s a gift, passion and privilege to express ourselves creatively. We are all being judged no matter what but while they judge, you are creating. You risk being ridiculed, you risk people saying your not good enough, but you are the one putting in the work to create and to get better and to continue to create because you’re an artist.
